life · sex

Try Before you Buy…Not talking Cars.

Sex before marriage. Whew.

So this is an interesting topic. I’ll give the history on where my viewpoints come from so you understand my stance on the matter.

*Clears throat*

Alright, so I was brought up in a Christian household. My mother was/still is a Minister of Music so I was in the church with her Sunday-Sunday until I was old enough to stay home, but please believe I was still at Bible Study on Wednesday’s and afternoon service on Sunday. In addition to that, i’m talking a household with the Blessed oil and multiple Bibles and devotions everywhere.

So with all that, I was brought up on the belief we are to save ourselves for marriage.

And I saw no issue with that. Plus, majority of my friends weren’t active either so it was no big deal, and it actually seemed like the norm to wait. It seemed like it was the goal for everyone. I was a young girl that had crushes and even then I wasn’t allowed to have a boyfriend. When I finally did get a boyfriend at around 18, I made it clear I was a virgin and I was going to stay that way until marriage.

I put my own chastity belt on.

Now, 11 years later, it seems as though the idea of marriage and sex has changed. Now, i’m not saying it changed abruptly, but gradually it has become less and less condemned. I mean, sex is everywhere and we all know it, so its not hard for it to get in our mindsets that sex is fine. Do it. Indulge. And people are!

Now, i’m no saint, however, it has not gotten’ to the point that sex has become one of the main requirements when in a relationship. The “Try before you buy” phrase is real with people now and days. And while i’m not knocking what anyone chooses to do with their body, I, myself don’t want to sit in every car to simply realize the color isn’t right, the horn doesn’t beep loud enough, or the steering is off, if you get my drift.

Some believe and others don’t that there is a such thing as Soul Ties. In the Bible, it speaks of how a married couple become “one flesh,” but not one soul, since marriage doesn’t exist in Heaven. However, according to scientists, the Soul Ties can be linked to the smell of the hormones we produce.

I don’t necessarily believe in the “Soul Ties,” but I do believe there is always some sort of connection between two after sex even if they are no longer in a relationship or communicating. I mean, sex is an intimate action, and even if you’re only engaging for the pleasure, there has to be some sort of tie that happens.

I dunno.

That’s just how I feel. Again, I was brought up a certain way and believe my body is a temple, and you can’t just let everyone in. Again, I’m no saint and i’m casting no judgment, because I fall short of the Glory of the Lord too. While I see the logic in “try before you buy,” I just don’t want to sit in multiple cars before I find the perfect fit and drive off.

“Girl, you gonna’ end up with a Vienna sausage”

And while I pray you don’t wish that on me,

Image result for please dont gif

even though I wrote all that, my flesh may fall weak and I may sit in the car.

The Lord knows my heart.

What are your thoughts?

One thought on “Try Before you Buy…Not talking Cars.

  1. Another great read. I grew up hella religious as well, but being a man in America I also grew up with different societal pressures than you. So I ended up losing my virginity when I was in middle school (7th grade). I was still going to church every Sunday and everything smh.


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